Monday, March 2, 2009

Boyz II Men

How ironic! I use to listen to the group "Boyz II Men". And now I have 2 boys of my own to raise to become men. Well, here's the problem. As far as I and most women are aware of, boys never grow up.

I have plans for my boys and that is to raise them to become compassionate, respectful, sincere, trust-worthy, hard-working, health conscience, considerate, modest gentlemen,
who will think with his head and not with his YOU KNOW WHAT! I actually looked up the definition of man. And to sum it up, the definition reads, man-(n)- the opposite of a female. Don't bother looking it up, it reads a lot of rubbish if you ask me. No, I'm not a chauvinist. I married a man for crying out loud! And may I say, that my husband has many of these great qualities. But lets face it, there's no such thing as the perfect man, nor is their such thing as the perfect women.

Society doesn't help the situation either. I think we (women) make it too damn easy for men. We need to treat our (*) like jewels and keep them safely locked up until he, that special someone, is worthy of it. The definition of worthy (worthy-
having worth or merit or value; being honorable or admirable; "a worthy fellow")

I know what you're thinking. Yes, I've made my share of mistakes. Life is all about making mistakes and learning from them.
Making the same mistakes over and over again is when it becomes a waste of precious time and energy. And unfortunately, that's when hearts get broken. Is this making any sense?

I read an interesting article the other day. It stated that when women have sex it causes the brain to release
oxytocin. Oxytocin is a hormone that also acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain. It signals us to bond and mate with that person. Back in the day people would get married, have sex, and produce children, much different than today's society. Giving birth and breast feeding a child also causes the brain to release oxytocin, therefore, bonding with your children and nurturing them. It recommended women to wait or abstain from having any physical contact while dating someone. That way you're able to make a clear, rational decision without getting caught in the "oxytocin trap"- falling in love with someone you don't know. Is this person right for me? Does this person make me happy? Is this person worthy?

I sure wish someone would have shared this bit of information with me when I was on the market. Fortunately, I finally found my soulmate and was wise enough to wait to make a clear headed decision. Now back to the point of my story. I'm fully aware of how men think from my experiences in the past. And I still believe that boys never grow-up no matter how perfect they are. But I do believe that I can mold my '
boyz' to become gentlemen who are worthy, and in return attract sincere, intelligent women who are dignified.