What a beautiful, shitty vacation!

What a beautiful, shitty vacation we had this Mother's Day weekend! The beautiful part was where we stayed, which was in a luxurious condominium overlooking the bay, called the Kelly Towers Plantation, in Destin, Fl. We stayed with my cousin who loves the finer things in life and remarkably stays down to earth, her 6-year old daughter, and her husband.

The shitty part was my children. Not necessarily my kids, but because of their age. A 2-year-old and a nine-month-old is not a right age to be traveling. Especially, if the vacation is a short one and the destination takes over 2 hours to get there. It took us approximately 6 hours and a few stops to change diapers and adjust positions.

If you are going to make a trip to the beach with the grandparents and the children, you must stay for at least a week in the same townhouse, condominium, etc., fully equipped. And the building should be smack in front of the beach! Do not separate the family, the grandparents with one child in one building and the parent and the other child in another. (PARENT, as in the husband conveniently decided to stay behind.) Because, you are bound to need something for the child you're with that's in the bag that got sent with the grandparents and the other child in the OTHER building. At this age and the difference between ages, they share just about everything, right down to the size of their diaper. Speaking of which, my 9-month-old is a bit plump and is catching up fairly quickly to his older brother. If you must separate the group, then both places should be equipped with everything, such as a freakin' kitchen! Needless to say, the grandparents and I ran ourselves ragged, walking from one building to the other, every time we needed something.

OK, also, I must say that if you're planning on staying with relatives or friends, make sure you know that person very well. Make sure you know and except their personality, and that they will be able to handle yours as well. My cousin is a bit of a clean freak. Her anxiety builds up with sudden movements, loud noises and crumbs on the counter tops. She also feels that there needs to be a game plan way before you can think of a game. My parents have a personality that is the total opposite. They are "pack rats", "go with the flow", "play it by ear", "whistle while you work" type of individuals. They pick up the mess at the end of a task. If they miss the bus, they'll simply wait for the next one to come along, sort of speak. I fall somewhere in between. Probably because I married a "clean freak", "plan ahead", "get your ass in gear", "wipe on, wipe off" type of individual. I can almost much tolerate any personality. So, I know how to adapt to people pretty quickly. And to prove it, my brother-in-law is living with us at the present time, and I'm tolerating him. End of discussion.

My personality shines when something of "importance" is lost or if I'm running late. My anxiety builds up because of "procrastination". That's when I explode into panic mode! Although, I must say, I do work well under pressure. But if I lose something, because of my absent mindedness, I freak out and I find someone to blame! That's, basically, what happened this weekend when I lost my purse. I can't blame it totally on my disorder. Walking from one place to another like a crazy person, because my kids needed something that was, without a doubt, left in the other building, I believe, had something to do with it. Thank God I found it! I would have had the sumptuous, affluent, languishing retirement community under lock down! Because my purse didn't just simply walk away for God sake! In my mind, we most certainly were burglarized! And it has absolutely NOTHING to do with growing up in New Orleans!

Overall, the vacation turned out to be a learning experience. Thanks to the children. My 2-year-old and my cousin's 6-year-old beautiful daughter had a great time playing together. I was happy to see that our abnormal behavior did not seem to affect them at all. In fact, we all can learn something from our children. As I observed the two of them playing, I noticed how happy and carefree they were with each other. It was like nothing else existed nor mattered to them, but each others company. NO HOUSE. NO FURNITURE. NO BREAKABLES. NO SCHEDULE. NO TIME. NO DISORDERS. NO MIRRORS. NO PRIDE. NO EGO. NO MONEY. only each others presence seems to matter. My child learned so much from watching his cousin this weekend. And I was thankful that their focus was on each other and not on our compulsive personality disorders we all seem to develop as adults and strangely not as children.

Supermom!

Look up at the sky! It's a bird! It's a plane! No... it's SUPERMOM! Yeah, that's right, I'd rather be called supermom than octopussy. I was told when I became pregnant with baby number 2, shortly after number 1, not to worry. "You just do it." I was told. "You'll become Supermom!" HELL! They weren't lying!

I'm thinking of that day, when I was ambitious enough to go to the gym with my 2 babies. (baby no.1, twenty-month-old & baby no.2, four-month-old) Well, this gym, and I won't say the name, is reputable and supposedly one of the best gyms in the state, So I've heard. I decided this is the gym I would join. They have all the amenities you can think of, and even cater to families with small children. They have a great swimming pool with a lazy river, great daycare, and so on and so forth. I didn't have any children 3 years ago when I joined, and wasn't planning on having any. Well OBVIOUSLY if I had 3 dogs, 2 birds, and a lizard! Oh, and a talking parrot, thank you very much.

Anyway, this FABULOUS gym that I belong to 3 years later, (which I'm currently paying for and never go) has all the amenities but a stinking elevator. And they decided to put there daycare on the 2nd FLOOR! So, when I get there, my plan is to put my newborn in the baby B-jorn, and stroll my toddler through the parking lot. I can't imagine holding him by the hand and walking him. What if he wants to pull away from me? and then....Well, you get the picture. Crazy, right? Not to mention the great distance my little toddler would assume we were walking towards. JAPAN!

Everything works like a charm until I get to the part with the stairs. "OKAY", I said. This is going to be a LITTLE more challenging then I thought. I ask the sweet girl behind the desk, "what shall I do with my stroller?" She suggested to leave it at the bottom of the stairs by the side entrance, where if anyone decides they need a stroller, they can just help themselves to mine. "fine", I said. I proceeded to walk up the stairs with my baby in my pack, and my toddler by the hand. By the way, he had a great time climbing those stairs. What is it with toddlers and stairs? We finally made it to the top of Mount Everest, I drop off the babies at the daycare facilities, and everything is working A-OK, thus far. I workout for about an hour, then go fetch the children. Well, when I get there, my toddler acts like he hasn't seen me in YEARS and decides to climb up me like a little monkey, which is fine by me, but, there is only room for one in my pack, and I still have baby no.2 to deal with. So, of course, he has the biggest fit, and cradles my leg for dear life! At that moment, I remember wanting to twitch my nose to get us where we needed to be... HOME!

Thank goodness for the sweet girl who offered to carry my toddler down the stairs with me. I can only imagine what I looked like to her. Something out of National Geographic, I'm sure!