Wednesday, May 6, 2015

FOOD FOR THOUGHT


This morning, as I prepared my breakfast which consisted of fresh avocados, queso fresco (fresh cheese) wrapped in a corn tortilla, some pepper accidentally landed in my glass of OJ. I then thought, why not sprinkle some more? To my tastes buds' wonderment... It was Pretty. Damn. GOOD.
I shall name it; ORANGE YOU AWAKE YET?!
`(Recipe follows)

ORANGE YOU AWAKE YET?!

8oz of Orange juice of your liking

1 to 2 sprinkles, or MORE, of black pepper

For an explosive taste and extra BANG, Substitute cayenne pepper. Oh, what the hell, add a splash of vodka to give it Bigger BANG. 

Tip of the Day: Cayenne pepper is one of the best natural herbs for weight loss.



Now stir and enjoy!



“You see things and you say, ‘Why?’ But I dream things that never were and I say, ‘Why not’?” – George Bernard Shaw




Monday, May 4, 2015

Optometrist vs Ophthalmogist

"Great News!" is what she said. "What you have is not internally, but superficial. The white spot you have on your retina is called "phlyctenule" which is the red angry leash of blood vessels responding to your inflammation and a bacteria called "Staphylococcus" on your eyelid." (Stegasauruswhah?) "You have Staphylococcal hypersensitivity, to be precise. This occurs when you accumulate more bacteria than usual. Sometimes excess oils in the Meibomian glands will stimulate more bacterial growth on the lids." Okay, whatever you say, Doc. I'm just happy that I'm finally at the RIGHT place, seeing the RIGHT kind of doctor, with the RIGHT prognosis.

You see, eventually, when my eyelid puffed up like the size of a giant marshmallow, is when I made the decision to see a doctor right away. Hence, I began my search online. Well, as I typed ophthalmologist, I misspelled the word which then Google corrected, which THEN popped up with the word optometrist. Apparently, I was in panic mode at the time, because I would've recognized it then that this is a much more complex situation that needed to be treated by an ophthalmologist. Instead, I called right away to book an appointment for that day with the first optometrist that popped up on the list of doctors in the area. I don't entirely fault Google for this. I should have known something was wrong when I arrived at the clinic. Every person in there browsing nonchalantly at fashionable eyewear with their not-a-worry-in-the-world look, I was the only one who had the just-stepped-out-of-the-ring-with-Mike-Tyson look. To seal the deal, while I patiently waited for the optometrist to walk in, a tall and dark, handsome young man entered the room wearing godawful green scrubs. (Well hello there, Doctor) (Why, indeed, you can look in my eye) And he did. He did with an enormous thingamajig and said it's an ulceration, prescribed me antibiotics and suggested to come back to see him in a week. (I can hardly wait) So after the fourth day of using the antibiotics, and still not seeing any improvements, I went in to see him earlier than intended with the one eye I had left. (I'm afraid we need to stop seeing each other. You blinded me with Science...Literally) "You're right. It's not getting better, but the good news is it's not getting worse, and I will need to recommend you to an ophthalmologist who specializes in the retina and can diagnose you appropriately." (Opthalmolowhah?)





So I had to say goodbye to my optometrist, and off I went to see the right kind of doctor I had originally thought of seeing in the first place had it not been for Google Smarty Pants!